How being competitive and “the best” can ruin us
Being the best feels good because we can prove that we are beyond our capabilities but how much more do we have to give into this standard of being “the best” when it slowly ruins us?
Sometimes, it gets too much that we have to remind ourselves that we just have to do our best.
Pretty sure, at some point in our lives, we’ve experienced feeling good about praises of our passion and hard work. We smile from ear to ear when someone praises our skills, especially if it’s a rare moment.
Improving is not bad because that is where growth happens. But there are instances where we slowly get fed up with this voice saying that we have to strive for more and beat everyone else.
So how does being “the best” and being competitive slowly ruin us?
There will be no room for improvement
The slightest criticism can cause us to explode or start a fight with someone. It’s like saying that we are not taking “no” for an answer.
We unconsciously feel like a robot, programmed to be the best in a snap. But really, we are not an AI machine.
Being a fast learner can be a natural skill but it won’t apply to everything. It takes time for us to grow, even in our area of expertise.
Everyone around us is our enemy
Because there is this need to be “the best,” people who stand in our way are competitors. Those “competitors” may look like a threat even if they are simply doing things without competition. Unconsciously, we might end up comparing ourselves to them, whether it be comparing how better we are than them or how better they are than us.
We might end up making a competition out of everything. Heck, even setting the table could be a competition.
We’ll have trust issues even with family and friends
When competition becomes automated in us, we feel like everyone or any living creature is our competitor. Everyone, meaning our family and friends. In our peers, there will always be a person who can do things swiftly or finish a task better than us. Then, there is this desire that we have to show we can do that too.
Again, we don’t want the reason for a broken relationship to happen because of petty one-sided competition, right?
We’ll start questioning how much more we have to give
We give and we give until nothing is left. But apparently, we still give up even when we can feel our brain drying up from squeezing those brain juices.
Sometimes, the standard and internal pressure cause us to give more until we have a breakdown. This is where we question where we lacked or on how much more we have to prove that we are giving a lot. And no, this is not a sign of being “too” emotional because, at some point, we have to let our emotions out after putting up a strong facade.
It will drain us mentally, physically, emotionally, basically…IN ALL ASPECTS
Believe it or not, being competitive can ruin our self-esteem because we need to prove what we’re capable of. We’ll live a life of pleasing people.
We become exhausted but we don’t care as long as we function and strive for perfection and to be “the best.”
It’s okay to make mistakes and it’s okay to be critical. But it becomes unhealthy if we beat ourselves up over everything.
Making mistakes is part of life and that is where we grow. Perfection is a state of mind that shouldn’t be used as a label to force us into reaching standards that aren’t good for our health.
If things aren’t doing well, it is never wrong to seek professional help. Through this, we get to know ourselves better and listen to different perspective on things.
Remember, we don’t have to be good at everything. We don’t have to be the best. Trying and doing our best is enough.
If things don’t go out as planned—it’s okay. Life’s not a race and we have all the time in the world to grow.
There will always be someone better at what we do. And that’s okay as long as we keep growing and improving ourselves.
Every achievement and step matters. Be proud of it, whether they’re big or small.
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